As yet another Crusader Kings 2 sale rolled around (this time apparently in celebration of the game’s three-year birthday – congrats!) I finally scooped up the last bit of DLC with Charlemagne. And seeing how much I had saved I treated myself to some cosmetics. Cosmetic DLC like new unit models for Saxons and the like, that is. Do I have all the DLC? No but so close it makes no difference. Iberians is where I draw the completely arbitrary line for some reason.

This isn’t really meant to be a rumination on the ethics of Paradox’s DLC policy regarding CK2. It is meant as a celebration that I now have a good reason to start a fresh CK2 campaign all the way back in the 8th century. With chroniclers tracking my every move, with fresh faces, new old clothes and an abundance of ‘historically accurate’ dynasty shields. It’s going to be great.

So, listen up all you fresh-faced, oldtimey-clothed, accurately-shielded people. This time we’re gonna get things right. We’ll plunder the Byzantine dukes but we’ll spread out in groups of three so they can’t raise any armies against us [Yeah!]. We’ll score cheap religious zealotry points by smashing up defenceless Irish churches [Yeah!] And we’ll marry our cousins and breed like bunny rabbits just as soon as we get rid of gavelkind [HELL Yeah! Wait, that won’t be for hundreds of years!? [I know, just… tide yourselves over until then, okay?]]

I might even do a bit of AAR’ing of this attempt. If nothing else it should help me remeber to quit before 1 AM so I can jot down some AA thoughts. That’s usually when I start making decisions based on spite and rage. Wasn’t that also one of Machiavelli’s tips to the young Medici prince? “Layeth downe thy schemes and get thee to bed before the clocke striketh one as thy strategemizing will sucketh thereafter”?