C’thun Cockup


The centrepiece of the Old Gods expansion for Hearthstone, C’thun, looks like equal parts Vagina Dentata and One-Eyed Meat Monster (note the goo-spitting attack). Does that mean that someone at Blizzard thinks the ultimate horror is a ghastly genitalia (gender?) mixup?

Of course, getting your C’thun out sounds rude regardless of sex.

Keep on truckin’


My last post got a bit of a bump after being featured in RPS’ Sunday Papers yesterday. When I say a bit of a bump, I mean that it got 5 views in the first week after it was published and in the past 24 hours it has garnered 4,000 views. So I’m obviously grateful to RPS editor Graham Smith who included it in his weekly round-up and pleased that the RPS comments are all positive.

In case you’re wondering after reading the post just how seriously I take the game myself, the answer is very seriously. Yesterday – at same time as The Sunday Papers piece unbeknownst to me featured the post – I was realising the dream of owning my own truck. Behold my Volvo FH Globetrotter XL with Eastern Eagle rims and chrome handles and custom hot cerise metallic paint and bullhorns and stuff in all it’s glory. God, ain’t she a beaut’? How could you not take this shit seriously?

When two trucks go to war


This video showcases a mod for Euro Truck Simulator 2 that turns a humble 90 km/h-capped truck into a monster racer doing 560 km/h. That’s roughly half the speed of sound in case you’re wondering.

I enjoy the sedateness of driving in ETS2. It’s humdrum in a good way and requires only low-level attention and skill (until you suddenly remember your turn at the last minute). It can be a way to drift into a slightly meditative/sleep-ready state. It can be a walking simulator where walking can be as challenging as you want it to be. It can be a vehicle (no pun intended) for podcast listening or music enjoyment. It can be a way for ADHD sufferers to focus. It can be quite relaxing.

Racing seems antithetical to the game as played by most people. However, the mod is a) an entirely optional add-on for those who seek it out and b) quite funny. I for one found the video hilarious. When trucks fly and so on.

That’s not how BahamutX sees it, though.

Continue reading



It was only earlier today that I thought to myself that I missed the old Humble Indie bundles. I may or may not have been prompted by yet another goddamn urging to join humble monthly. No, I don’t need games like a book club. HIBs were – in my recollection – rare enough to be a cause for celebration. A book from the book club is not a cause for celebration, more a cause for promising yourself that you’ll look into how to get out. Well, look what cat dragged in: It’s a good old fashioned Humble Indie Bundle (no. 16)! Where all games are actually available DRM-free as well as on Steam and all are truly crossplatform and all support truly wothwhile causes (EFF/Wikimedia). And hey, one of the games included is site favourite Else Heart.Break() and while you can only own one copy, it doesn’t hurt to support it some more. Time to party like it’s 2010.

Only in Else Heart.Break() 2: F*** wit tha police


The police woman was hogging the computer. That’s my excuse. By “the computer”, I mean one of the five or six in the police station, the rest of which were at my disposal. And by “was hogging” I mean “using in her work hours”. But I wanted the one she was using and I didn’t want to wait.

So I started one of the other computers and used it first to zap her into a sleep state and then to magically transport her onto the bed of one of her own cells. After I had changed the cell door to only allow people named “Sebastian” through, of course. It’s not my fault if she’s not called Sebastian. It’s not like it’s a closed membership club, anyone is free to join.

Turns out her computer was nothing special, so I left pretty quickly. It’s been a couple of days now. I really should go check on her.

Only in Else Heart.Break() 1: Go home, Sisyphus


I want access to the mayor’s apartment but the guard standing in front of it won’t let me past. I try to find a way to remove her but eventually I figure there’s an easier way: Hack another door to give access to the mayor’s apartment rather than the room behind it. Closest one at hand is the mayor’s aide’s apartment on the opposite side of the town hall. I hazard a guess at the name of the mayoral apartment door. Success, I’m in. I find nothing of interest and leave by the back door. On returning to the town hall a curious sight greets me. It’s late and the aide is drowsily returning to his apartment. Only when he enters by the door to his own apartment he finds himself back in the mayor’s. And so he keeps endlessly traversing the town hall in search of home and rest and finding neither. It’s almost Greek.